This tale begins when Christmas in my family officially kicks off. Black Friday!
Black Friday is a time-honored tradition in my family, which begins over pumpkin pie on Thanksgiving Day. All of the ladies in my family gather around the table, distribute coveted Black Friday ads, make scrolling lists (or, if you're my mother, spreadsheets), and create a plan of attack. I remember as children, my cousins and I rifling through ads, excitedly circling toys and clothes we hoped to unwrap on Christmas Eve. And the year my mother introduced Olive to this time-honored tradition, placing a fat black marker in her kindergarten hand, pointing out a few ideas. Of course, Olive was a natural.
Black Friday morning, my mom and I were up before the sun and heading out to collect my aunts and grandma. Festivities began on one side of town with peppermint cocoa. We continued checking things off our lists until strategically landing at the mall for lunch to refuel, winding down around 2 pm when the final early bird sales had ended. We'd pile ourselves and our packages into the car and drive home, singing Christmas carols on the radio and chattering about the triumphs of the day.
Consumerism aside, (sidebar: HUGE kudos to all the stores staying closed on Thanksgiving! I've hated seeing Black Friday creep closer and closer to Thanksgiving Day until finally eclipsing it several years back, meaning those working in the stores weren't spending the day with their families just so that strangers could scuffle over $5 towels.) Black Friday has always been a special and super fun day to enjoy with all the women in my family.
When I moved to Hawaii in 2010, I knew the holiday season, particularly this day, would be riddled with homesickness. Luckily, the universe had gifted me with meeting Abby around the same time.
Like me, she was a new, young mother, living far away from her family. We became fast friends and were grateful to celebrate Thanksgiving together, knowing we were both missing big family gatherings back home. Abby and her family also fun Black Friday traditions she was missing, so together, we conspired to create our own.
It's 85 degrees (that's around 30 Celcius, for my European friends ;) ) and sunny? Who cares? Spaghetti straps it is! Not an evergreen tree in sight? Fine! We'll go to Target. Stroll through the artificial tree displays. Plus, they even have a Starbucks. Perfect! Our plan was hatched.
The next morning we loaded our babies up and headed to the Aiea Target, channeling all the Black Friday vibes we could.
In reality, the experience was underwhelming and left us missing home even more. There were no crowds. No Santas all dressed up ready to grant Christmas wishes. Our girls were just babies, so no special toy we had to score. Instead, we meandered through the holiday displays and shared the ways our moms made Christmas so special year after year. We reminisced over our favorite holiday pastimes, from the sweets we made to matching family pajamas.
We made one final stop before declaring our efforts a bust, grabbing a peppermint mocha for the ride home. Stepping outside, we were greeted by Hawaii's perpetual summer, rendering our steamy drinks wretchedly undesirable. The searing sun, further amplified by my leather seats, had us instantly sweating and regretting the cup of holiday "cheer."
Exacerbated and homesick, I snapped, "What is this?! It's the end of November! We should be wearing hats and scarves. We should shiver when we get in the car- not drip sweat drinking a coffee!"
Abby emphatically agreed, "Ridiculous!" The outburst sent us reeling into laughter that morphed to tears almost just as quickly.
There we sat, sniffling. Two young women with brand new babies and the only moms to be found around were us. Despite our best efforts, we were homesick AF.
Deciding to rally, I asked Abby to tuck blankets over the girls in their car seats. We cranked the air conditioning to full blast and sang our hearts out to the most classic Christmas hits I could find, and sipped on Starbucks, our noses running from the manufactured cold.
This Black Friday, unlike any other, was forever etched into my heart. In a situation where each of us was so desperately looking for familiarity, we found each other. And never let go.
As many of us find ourselves missing the comfort of annual traditions and usual company this year, I hope you, too, find ways to rally. In my experience, this is where one can discover the most magical and lasting memories of all.
